Years ago, I was introduced to the concept of liminal space by Camilla Gryski, a wonderful therapeutic clown. She spoke about the play of children as taking place in a liminal space--not the regular life of the child but not altogether fantasy either. It appealed to me as an idea: that you could be in a sort of 'space in-between', where perhaps some of the normal limits are dissolved, where life is more ambiguous and you are more open to what the world is offering. It seems to me that David and I are in a kind of liminal space here in La Rochelle. We are settled in this one lovely place, making a life here and being quite successful at it. But we know it will end on July 23rd. We know we will return to Toronto in September and pick up the threads of what I sometimes think of as our 'real' life. We do live a 'real' life here: we go about the daily activities of living--shopping for food, using the bank machine, going to the gym but somehow it has taken on a sense of adventure. In spite of the fact that we know it will end, this interlude seems to stretch immeasureably in front of us. Everyday errands and tasks take longer, we spend more time talking to people and asking questions, walk more slowly because we are looking more carefully. Even life's irritations are different. Because we are in France, instead of getting angry and then forgetting about it, we tend to analyze the irritation: is this something that happens all over the country? why did it irritate us? what could be the reason behind this behaviour?
It was like that with banking. We had enormous difficulty while still in Canada, finding a French bank that would allow us to open an account before we arrived. Finally, David discovered the wonderful Patricia at the Banque Populaire Occitane. There are Banques Populaire everywhere in France so we thought this was a good choice. Patricia was very helpful from afar and her fluency in English was a big bonus. However, the effort to open this account was enormous, required an amount of documentation and hassle unheard of in Canada. It has not been without problems since. They are byzantine rules about when, where and how much money you can withdraw from a bank machine. The Banque Populaire Occitane which is in the south west of France has nothing much to do with the Banque Populaire Atlantique (the area where we live). This means that we cannot deposit into our account here and have the balance increase immediately. Non--it is as though we are doing a transfer from different bank altogether and it takes 3-5 working days. However, now that we are clients of the Banque there are many benefits to us that are easier to access than they would be in Canada like borrowing money for a house or a car. Our Banque experience is much like the bisous: life in France is organized in a way that is new to us. There are lots of rules: explicit ones like the Banque and implicit ones like the bisou. The various levels of goverment influence daily life more than in Canada and people expect more from the State than we do. On the other hand, there is a contradictory attitude that rails against the rules and looks for ways to contravene them whenever possible. As a foreigner, it is very difficult to work out where the line falls and even what the rules are. It is one of the unnerving but also exciting parts of living here.
This feeling of 'in-between space' colours how we live in ways we keep discovering. It has been such an interesting experience to make new friends. Everyone we meet is a stranger. Although they probably have assumptions about us, we are free to reinvent ourselves. And so, I have become a slightly different person as the La Rochelle Jeanette than I am as the Toronto Jeanette. I think I am less serious, more animated in French; I talk with my hands and I hear my voice intonations changing more often. I find it easier to be funny or in some way, my sense of humour appeals to French people. I am now a chocolate enthusiast and my daughter has pointed out that I seem to be holding my alcohol better due to long meals with lots of wine! I will never again dare to leave the house wearing sweat pants! I am also friendlier. I talk with anyone and start conversations in shops and in the street in a way I never would do as the Toronto Jeanette. It is sad, perhaps, that I have little interest in the thoughts and opinions of my compatriots but find whatever a French person has to say to be rivetting. This is only partly about the ever present need I have to keep practicing so talking to anyone is an exercise of learning French. It is more than that. By having these conversations I learn a little each time about how French people think and it adds to our knowledge. More importantly, I think I have become less judgmental and more willing to try to understand the reasons behind whatever is happening.
And so the question is: have I really become the slowed-down, more understanding person that I seem to be in this liminal space? When we return to Toronto, will the La Rochelle Jeanette become the Toronto Jeanette? I hope so.
It was like that with banking. We had enormous difficulty while still in Canada, finding a French bank that would allow us to open an account before we arrived. Finally, David discovered the wonderful Patricia at the Banque Populaire Occitane. There are Banques Populaire everywhere in France so we thought this was a good choice. Patricia was very helpful from afar and her fluency in English was a big bonus. However, the effort to open this account was enormous, required an amount of documentation and hassle unheard of in Canada. It has not been without problems since. They are byzantine rules about when, where and how much money you can withdraw from a bank machine. The Banque Populaire Occitane which is in the south west of France has nothing much to do with the Banque Populaire Atlantique (the area where we live). This means that we cannot deposit into our account here and have the balance increase immediately. Non--it is as though we are doing a transfer from different bank altogether and it takes 3-5 working days. However, now that we are clients of the Banque there are many benefits to us that are easier to access than they would be in Canada like borrowing money for a house or a car. Our Banque experience is much like the bisous: life in France is organized in a way that is new to us. There are lots of rules: explicit ones like the Banque and implicit ones like the bisou. The various levels of goverment influence daily life more than in Canada and people expect more from the State than we do. On the other hand, there is a contradictory attitude that rails against the rules and looks for ways to contravene them whenever possible. As a foreigner, it is very difficult to work out where the line falls and even what the rules are. It is one of the unnerving but also exciting parts of living here.
This feeling of 'in-between space' colours how we live in ways we keep discovering. It has been such an interesting experience to make new friends. Everyone we meet is a stranger. Although they probably have assumptions about us, we are free to reinvent ourselves. And so, I have become a slightly different person as the La Rochelle Jeanette than I am as the Toronto Jeanette. I think I am less serious, more animated in French; I talk with my hands and I hear my voice intonations changing more often. I find it easier to be funny or in some way, my sense of humour appeals to French people. I am now a chocolate enthusiast and my daughter has pointed out that I seem to be holding my alcohol better due to long meals with lots of wine! I will never again dare to leave the house wearing sweat pants! I am also friendlier. I talk with anyone and start conversations in shops and in the street in a way I never would do as the Toronto Jeanette. It is sad, perhaps, that I have little interest in the thoughts and opinions of my compatriots but find whatever a French person has to say to be rivetting. This is only partly about the ever present need I have to keep practicing so talking to anyone is an exercise of learning French. It is more than that. By having these conversations I learn a little each time about how French people think and it adds to our knowledge. More importantly, I think I have become less judgmental and more willing to try to understand the reasons behind whatever is happening.
And so the question is: have I really become the slowed-down, more understanding person that I seem to be in this liminal space? When we return to Toronto, will the La Rochelle Jeanette become the Toronto Jeanette? I hope so.
